Cindy Lauper

I've made some MONUMENTAL changes in the last 4 days. It's bizarre whenever I meet up with someone new from the LSS I have this extreme enthusiasm about me which borders on the straight up insane. However it is only when drinks are involved. I am what you call a happy drunk. I get over-enthusiastic and fun-loving. I'm actually quite a joy to be around. Tons of energy and just down-right wacky. The reason I am referring to my drunken ways today is due to getting my first ever kiss close. I shall detail how I managed to lord it up at 4 clubs. Pretty bizarre night.

So, I decided to post on the LSS in an attempt to look for a wing. I didn't get too many responses so I did the next best thing which was to sort of tag along to a meetup. I made a variety of responses to numerous dudes and even went as far as to read field reports consequently Pm-ming the dudes I felt were most suitable to my needs.

I happened to get a response Wednesday night. Awesome stuff. At first I considered not going however, as this had been possibly the best week I've had for quite some time I thought fuck it. I txt back. We decided to meet in front of Covent Garden Station. His name was Jonas..lol. The most awesome wing man I've had for quite some time. He was so chill and he had this really awesome accent which made opening sets a breeze. It showed girls that I was cultured and open-minded unlike a lot of black stereoptypes.

So we had met up to go on a pub crawl. I had never heard of such a thing but thought why not?. It ended up being the most wicked night I can remember. We started the night at a small pub just getting to know each other. He was here for the weekend, had a seminar with PUATraining and just decided on a whim that he would leave for London. Not that it's a big deal considering both our countries are in the EU. Anyways we got off to a flying start. I hadn't had a lick of sleep that day and was running on pure adrenaline. Drinks started flowing. Jonas got the first, I got the second and so on. We positioned ourselves rather awkwardly at the bar. Near the end. As our mission had been to actually close some bitches we started plotting.

I had made eyecontact with a red-head Hb6 with awesome style. We'll call her Cindy Lauper. I had broken the ice by showing her my pub crawl band. She responded with a smile. So we went over to the girls. We had the most awesome icebreaker. I just started Hi5ing everyone. We started Hi5ing the chicks. Sweet opener as it was really high energy and was fun. We got off to a quick start. I started to maneuvre the set which had a hb4 and hb3. They were pretty cool girls.

They were all from Australia which was awesome considering I had never really approached an Australian bird. I hear they are pretty much blokes with vaginas. LOL. Anyways conversation fizzled out but Jonas persisted despite this. I made an attempt to isolate Cindy Lauper but she was really shy. My game just isn't sharp enough yet to sort of get out the wild side in girls plus being drunk didn't really help in terms of being take seriously. Despite all this Jonas persisted although the girls attraction levels were falling at shocking levels. My convo with Cindy Lauper had fizzled out. We decided to make a move. I then proceeded to lord up the venue. I started hi-5ing everybody, toasting left, right and centre.

Some were receptive, others thought I was a nut and rightly so. No worries. I didn't give a shit. Whilst Jonas went to the toilet I proceeded to chat up a group of women. All of which looked like they were part of some work party, probably out for a few. I approached with the same opener as before. I was pretty high energy when I came in but slightly more composed. I cheek-kissed all 6 of them. I then proceeded to ask them how they all knew each other. As guessed they were down for a drink and some had just arrived in the country. I managed to create some jealousy plots as I jumped from circle to circle.

I then merged sets which seemed extremely natural. Once I had built up enough social value I proceeded to chat to the dudes who were once more very cautious and frankly quite pissed. No problemo. As I had built up some rapport with one of the event leaders whose name escapes me, I decided to re-engage with a sweet little opener to get the other event leader on my side. It worked like a charm. The girls had been enthralled by the wizardry that I was pulling off in that little mini-pub. It was fucking mad I have to say. It was like I was on this highway to paradise. Jonas had been an incredibly useful team-mate in that he provided me with some social proof. Also, considering that I was the only black fellow in the pubcrawl I was already unique and too have the added bonus of being cultured really did most of the work for me when opening.

We then proceeded to the next pub. I took this opportunity to chat up few of the girls, to get a rapport started. I even linked arms with the event leader to the place. I got massive social proof.
We were then joined by an incredibly good-looking couple. I happened to take a liking to the bird if I might say so. She was like a lil Megan Fox. Seriously She was sexy as fuck. The dude was pretty laid back and cool which helped because I was really trying to make a move on the chick. I managed to get her attention when we were leaving pub 2.

In pub 2 I had made an effort to engage other members of the crew which I found to be harder now as the alcohol effects were wearing off. The girls had been very unreceptive aswell. No problems though. As ever Jonas the Legend came through. He used his german charm and boyish good looks to open the girl. I saw the opportunity and pounced on her. The opener? 'I think you have a really pretty forehead, you're like a little baby' JONAS, you have to love this man's randomness. The girl responded on cue. However, I stepped in and said ' I think what he meant to say was that he finds you very attractive and that a nice forehead tends to be the main reason girls are pretty' pretty lame but it sort of saved it because I didn't want to appear the bizarre black dude that was just lurking.

It worked. As I had seen the couple entering together, I remained respectful and asked whether they were together. She said yes, I probed a bit more, it seemed they were very happy together, typical love story of love lost and found again. Anyways being me I tried to holla at this honey as we were leaving pub2. As I had already established a bit of rapport with the honey's dude, I acknowledged him and assured him that nothing was going to happen. I have to be honest though, it could have I was in STATE. The words were flowing like water, pretty amazing stuff. On another note I did most of my sarging within the group sort of like social circle game which was awesome as I had a really fun-loving vibe. Some people didn't like it which is cool. High energy is fucking exhausting and it sure does get annoying.

Anyways I did a few approaches in club 3 which were pretty mediocre and much harder as I was getting creepier. I saw a gorgeous Hb7 half japanese half english babe. She was pretty hot. She was also a hired gun which probably meant that she hd to be nice. No problemo. However I did get a bit too sleazy which is something to eliminate from my game. I also need to learn how to calibrate. Otherwise I made some headway at this club. I managed to approach a pair of french birds who were pretty cool. Language barrier was killing the vibe though. Moving along.

On our way to club 4 I managed to ruin all that hard work. The event leader got pissed at my overly cocky teasing vibe. Too much of anything is bad. I managed to re-engage one of the girls from set 1 on the way to club 4. She was pretty cool about everything. Club 4 seemed inappropriately layed out. Really hard to get any sets going. I got stuck with this pair of swedes who define everything sweden is NOT about i.e. stunning blondes, silly accents etc. Hwoever they seemed pretty cool. I asked them whether they wanted to get drinks. A trick!..lol Pretty harsh but they didn't seem to mind. I left them getting drinks and made up some lame excuse to exit. I looked for Jonas who was dancing. More rapport with Jonas who got cooler by the minute. This group of chicks were practically grinding on the dude and he didn't seem to care. Another lost opportunity.

On another note I had told everybody that I was leaving for home at club 3 as the night was fizzling out. I made up some BS excuse about my GF. Quite believable at this point. Jonas said stay so did the cool aussie couple. By this time I had built a really cool rapport with the cute aussie chick. The dude seemed to like me aswell.

At the final level we got to a really cheesy bar by the name of ZOO bar. I have avoided this place like the plague for years. Anyways I was like fuck it. We got inside. By this time a lot of the girls found me to be rather annoying. Fuck it. Whilst chatting to Jonas Cindy Lauper decided she would give me the lazer eyes. Right back at ya babe! I went over and opened with ' You know you can't just look at me like that without saying something'. Worked like a charm. I could sense she was really drunk so it was like cool. She was like 'I thought you were leaving' I replied with 'I couldn't leave you babes, I had to see you one more time' Cheetos I know. She then proceeded to go for the kiss. I guess they weren't lying about these aussie chicks being blokes in disguise. We kissed, there was some tongue action, standard stuff. She was rescued by one of the ugs. I guess it had something to do with me being black, me not being her type, me having attracted one of her friends. The reasons were endless. Anyways Jonas wanted to go for a smoke so we did.

For some strange reason I find Cindy Lauper on the dance floor again. I then take a more direct role, this time we get to kissing hardcore. I had turned into the kissing banditouche. No number closes at all or even facebook closes which was mainly due to me not giving a fuck and really not having any hot babes around which tends to motivate me to try and close. Bizarrely this blonde chick kept staring at me and then running away anytime I was near her. That's girls for you. She was pretty hot, too much make up though.

I will try to close from now on just for practice. Day game also needs work as I've yet to even attempt a day approach. Night game needs more calibration, more transitioning and also frame control. Lots of work to do but I am committed to it.

Overall I found the night to be pretty decent especially for Jonas who had a few facebook closes. He didn't seem to haps though. Pretty laid back about it. He texted me a couple days later to meet for drinks but I chickened out. Fuck it though. This is one of many wings I will encounter.

The beautiful thing about this night is that it sorted of opened me up like never before. I seemed very sociable and incredible motivated to meet with people to create a larger social circle. The self-confidence I've gained from just that one night has seriously affected me deeply. I was overly enthusiastic when I went to the twins house the night after. The jokes were flowing. I even bought alcohol and really felt chatty as hell. Naomi me best mate was there. I seriously, think that girl is cool as hell, really laid back and a perfect match for Chris. Then it happened.

Joe came. I have to admit at first I was like ok cool, a chance to make another friend. Howver he was a bit of a dick. He wasn't attempting much convo which means he doesn't consider me high-value enough to speak to. Finally the convo started to flow. He seemed pretty cool. Alpha yes, but, don't try that shit with me. Several times he tried to dominate convos particularly when I spoke about the night before. I was holding court and then he tried to frame control with 'did you get any numbers though?' I responded with ' Yes man I got two'. I didn't. Frankly from then on the respect level just faster than you can say 'DICK HEAD'. We got to chat about hair cuts and he decided to compliment me on my new hair cut. However, I didn't say anything back to him. He then gave me a look of 'It's ON bitch'. Fuck it I'm a man I will not back away from a midget like Joe, no matter what the stories are about his supposed strength. I could give a FUCK!!. He attempted to compliment me again but I weren't having it.


Later in the night as the drinks were flowing and the ting was being smoked he tried to pull a sly one. He tried accuse me of acting weird and making strange faces. I called him on his BS, he persisted by stating he had photographic evidence, I denied it all. Overall I have to say Joe thinks he can challenge me with his tiny frame but doesn't realise that I will crush him both socially and physically. I'm sorry to say that I actually thought he was a cool dude at first but he just turned out to be an asshole not in a fun way but just fucking socially awkward. Typical male ego BS. Don't watch though, I am incredibly competitive when challenged, I don't back away when called out, especially by some little fuck.

Aside from that it was overall an amazing way to end february. I realised I had not employed most of the guidelines I had set for myself until then which drew me to the conclusion that the reason I had been lazy all this time was because of a lack of a social life. Seriously, that was the main reason. The preparation time was improving incredibly quick. I seemed more alive and sharp. I also felt really gutsy. It was as if I had been hiding this awesome human being all along beneath this veneer of low self-esteem. Not wanking also gave me an incredible edge. In fact I think not wanking is the main reason all this has happened so far. I had not wanked in 5 days and the effects were amazing. I felt really energised and my appearance had improved ten fold.

It's amazing what one night out and a kiss close can do for a man. I really felt on top of the world. This must be how Mus and Liban feel all the time. The problem is I don't recreate this feeling so that I can continue to feel like that all the time. Most of it has to do with state and also drinking (something I don't do regularly). I will post on wanking because I feel that this one thing has really crippled me socially. It's like I lose my swag whenever I wank. I wish to eliminate this thought process because not wanking can really fuck with your body chemistry. Also, working out helps something I must start again as I am getting lazy.

So that's it. I must create an active social life, not wank and workout more. These things will result in me getting laid like a rockstar. I will post more on not wanking.

Relapse

OOO...

Well I didn't mean to scare you with such a medical term. However in the last month I've been in and out of bad habits like socks. When people say bad habits die hard they are not joking.

Now for those people who know me, I have numerous incredibly bad habits. I've been reading several books and other sources in order to deal with these problems or sticking points as a man once told me.

Tragically I have a tendency to fall back into these bad habits or behaviours. I have been reading Anthony Robbins book 'Awaken the Giant Within' which is making more and more sense to me the more times I keep re-reading the same chapters. So far I have read two chapters and what has become apparent to me is the misconception that I've had regarding behaviour change. My focus has been on the behaviour as opposed to the cause behind it.

Anthony Robbins advocates that people are driven by two twin forces; Pain and Pleasure. Some people are inherently driven towards causing as much pleasure in their lives as possible and others somehow always end up in pain. AHA! (corny, I know :P). All this time I had been focusing on changing my sleeping patterns, changing my diet, my fitness, my financial situation, my social life. This approach had been stalling my progress for years because despite changing the behaviour of say, my sleeping pattern (my goal being to wake up early everyday), I'd end up back where I started; waking up at unholy hours such as 4-9pm.

For years this one thing has affected numerous aspects of my life from my health to social life and financial situation. I could describe all of the problems that sleeping late has caused in my life but like my previous post I'd rather remain positive and focus on solutions instead.

A couple of things that come to mind when thinking about the whole idea of goals is commitment. Lemme explain. When focusing on achieving my goals, I have looked at my whole life and written up a bunch of goals that I'd like to achieve then went about trying to achieve those goals. WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! Firstly, I focused on too many goals, thus making me efficient at multitasking but rubbish at perfection. Secondly, as a man multi-tasking is an unnatural act as men tend to be incredibly bad at doing too many things at once, the reason why you will never see a male secretary. Enough about gender relations and back to the topic! Thirdly, my vocabulary has been incredibly detrimental to my progress. Some examples of this include:

• Try
• Want
• Like
• May
• Can

My point being, that I had been trying rather than being committed to achieving a goal. See the difference. When I try something, I leave room for laziness. However, when I am committed to achieving something, it's concrete as it speaks not only of the present but the future also. There is simply no room for laziness or relapsing into bad habits. So as this is a solutions based blog, I will be posting ONLY solutions to problems I am having rather than dwelling on how the problems are affecting my day to day life.

What I have gained from the two chapters I have read from Tony Robbins is that I must focus on fewer goals, find a method of achieving these goals and change my method until I find one that works. I must also be very specific about the details of these goals i.e. the when, the why and the what. In summary, it is not the 'how' but the 'what' and 'why' that is important. As one of my fav authors stated 'you must begin with the end in mind'.

I took heed of this and adopted it to my life. I am committed to obtaining my driver's license by March 31st 2009. I am also committed to moving out of my mother's house once I have achieved my driver's license. I realise the second goal is not concrete, however, they are linked by finance. I must first raise the capital required in order to take driving lessons, pay for relative material, pay for provisional license, pay for theory and practical tests. So finance is the link.

I will not achieve any of these goals if I do not get some form of continually based capital. I am committed to achieving these goals. A good metaphor is that I am like an onion constantly peeling my outer layers (achieving my goals) until I am dead. Pretty dramatic I know.

The point of this post is this: Until recently I have been constantly looking at the symptoms rather than the actual cause behind the symptoms. In other words: why the hell do I do what I do?

Tony Robbins identified two twin forces that drive every human being to do what they do; Pain and Pleasure. He also identifies that the reason why things you know you should do are constantly procrastinated is because you associate a certain level of pain to them. This pain is held up by limiting beliefs that have been conditioned into me over the years and taken the form of 'bad habits'.

So........by re-framing those actual tasks as Pleasure they will eventually become ingrained into my day to day life.

This realisation had a profound effect on me because I now truly understand the reason why I do what I do; comfort which equals happiness. I brush my teeth really slow and deliberate not because I am retarded and have a slow neurotic system but because I hate bad breath and the effect it has on people's perception of me. This leads me to the fact that I actually care what people think of me which is not the preferred method of thinking for an aspiring PUA.

So all this is down to the fact that I care what people think about me. I have associated bad breath with pain which is good but the long process I take every morning in order to avoid bad breath is really bad as it is TIME CONSUMING. It also gives me red eyes which I hate as it makes it look like I've been deprived of sleep. Another bad look for an aspiring PUA.

So to combat this ;caring about what others think', I will take up improv classes. From what I've read improv classes can be pretty, ehm, adventurous, something ideal for my sticking point. All of the solutions to the problems I have stated in previous posts were valid but I have not remained committed to them because of this underlying belief that I care what people think.

There is a difference between being socially aware of yourself and caring what others think of you. By caring about what others think I am investing my self-esteem based upon what others think of me. BAD! This is an incredible realisation as after all these years in the community the one underlying message is that in order to be good with women or comfortable in female company you must be detached from social conditioning. You can't give a fuck about social norms if you wish to have a lot of casual sex with several females. There is no other option.

I am committed to attending improv classes in order to break off some of the social conditioning I have been subjected to over the years.

That's it. Until I achieve those goals I will not make any new ones. I am changing only the approach to achieving these goals such as researching new job vacancies on a daily basis, not wanking, improving my diet and fitness regime, improving my overall lifestyle. All of the content in the previous post are still relative and valid. I will continue to blog whenever I feel like it and also to take notes on a daily basis on my findings.

James

Solutions orientated, NOT problems orientated

The title is a clear indication of how my mentality will be like, from now onwards. I have hit rockbottom on so many levels that I am scared to find out how far I can go.

It hurts too much to even think about what my life will be like if I continue in the manner described in some of these posts.

I will not posts any more problems as I know what they all are now. I am focused on solutions only.My aim is to keep an ongoing routine so I can internalise this behaviour.

As most of my problems are down to a poor understanding of financial management and bad time management, I will focus on these two areas solely, for now.

TIME MANAGEMENT

Atrocious time management has landed me in quite a lot of shit in recent times and thus left me in the position I'm currently in. I have been told this from day one and its gone in one ear and well, you know the rest. Now let's look at some options and how I am incorporating these to my life.

Morning routine

I am cutting the time I spend on this considerably. That will only come from having a goal to strive towards which will create a sense of urgency. My current time spent on grooming/getting dressed and eating is ridiculous. It is currently at 2 hours. NOT EVEN A FUCKING WOMAN SPENDS THIS AMOUNT OF TIME. Absofuckinglutely ridiculous!!!! No more!!!

I am aiming to get ready in 30 minutes every morning, when I do hit this consistently I will reduce it to 20 minutes. YES I said it!! 20 minutes. To other people this is simple but a world class bum like meself considers this no measly feat. I will break down the different areas to the minute details so I can get on top of this. I will also post a max amount of time spent on each in order to reach my goal.

Wake Up
I wonder around, doing nothing but wondering. I usually spend an obscene amount of time on this; 10 minutes to be precise. I will now upon waking up drink a glass of water, which should stop some of the grooming problems like chapped lips, I will then walk straight to the toilet. Max amount of time: 1 minute

Dental Hygiene/Face/Showering/Grooming
Recently I have been spending an insane amount of time on brushing my teeth/ cleaning my tongue and flossing; 40 minutes. WHO THE FUCK BRUSHES THEIR TEETH FOR 40 minutes!?!?!?. This is insanity and is borderline OCDish.

I am purchasing a decent toothbrush (electronic), preferably those Oral B ones when I do get me finances correct but will settle for a battery powered one (£5) in the meanwhile. I am also purchasing some waxed floss and a tongue scraper. Mouth wash is uneccessary if I get the aforementioned under control.

My face is a big fucking problem for me. I went from a promising basketballer to a shy, socially awkward dude because of my interpretation of acne. I know I know, I should have listened to my father. Instead I was hard-headed and as a result I am writing this gentle abode to a once miserable experience. I have accepted that this problem is part of growing pains but also a reckless lifestyle.

I am going into the shower with my toothbrush as I wish to stop relying on mirrors and also minimise the time I spend on useless activities such as running around looking at myself. I will brush my teeth first, then gently scrape the sides/front/back of tongue (this will require a mirror at first but then with practice I will eliminate the mirror (also minimise gagging so as not to cause red eyes and vomit breath). I am then going to wash my face with tea tree oil and exfoliate with a soft-bristle toothbrush.

I am then going to wash my hair (shampoo 3 times a week with T-gel to eliminate dandruff and condition twice), I then move onto my armpits, then a quick skin scrub with the loofa, then the balls, then the arse and finally the feet. A quick body rinse will end it. Step out!!.

Pop any unlikely white heads. Shave (depends on my hairstyle) Apply facial toner then apply oil-free moisturiser to face/neck/ears. Apply body-moisturiser (shea butter preferably but coco butter will suffice). Apply Evo-cream onto dry infected skin rashes (This problem will eventually subside so this is not a permanent feature of my grooming routine.). Apply perfume. GET DRESSED.

Max time: 10 mins!!

Preparing and Eating Food
As I mentioned my skin is horrid, so I will need to get this sorted first. Now, onto solutions. I am cleaning up my diet/fitness/sleep. 8hrs a sleep per day without fail. Gym 3-4 every week plus 2 sessions of muay thai and jiu jitsu. 2 litres of water daily. Committing to a gluten-free /wheat free diet with fruits in the morning and vegetables with every meal. I am researching suitable diets which will help me achieve my fitness goals. I will prepare my meals the night before to save me time. Max time: 5 minutes!!

Briefing
Ensure EVERYTHING is in order from my appearance, hydration levels, tasks for the day, appropriate tools (uni books/work gear/gym gear).

SUMMARY

Wakeup and Drink water- 1minute
Dental hygiene,Grooming, Shower and Dressing- 1ominutes
Preparing and eating Food-5 minutes
Briefing-5 minutes

TOTAL: 16-17MINUTES


“Be pleasant until ten o'clock in the morning and the rest of the day will take care of itself.”

Elbert Hubbard (1856-1915)

Annoying receptionist and my other pet peeves

I dealt with a particularly bitchy receptionist today. STOP!!!

No, what actually happened was that I was particularly bitchy to a receptionist. Firstly, I have not the faintest idea about social cues and well, basic fucking manners. This isn't a self-hatred type of post, however, it brings to light the method in which I deal with most of life. If things don't go my way, I get spiteful which for a lack of better word also renders into the downright childish sometimes.

Today I spoke with a friendly receptionist and by friendly I mean not a complete bitch, only stern.
She was a prototype of someone who hates her fucking job and the people she works with. Indian of course, however this is not to say that her heritage and ethnicity has anything to do with her bitchyness. I enquired about a basic interview set-up with her manager, Mr. Amar.

To this request she gave the standard issue, 'Hand in your CV and if he likes it he will call you back'. Now, to say my CV is substandard is a HUGE overstatement. I've hardly had any callbacks based off of that CV. I've made several adjustments, however, I've failed to garner an interest. That is not to say my search has been fruitless, I have had a few interviews, however, the first impressions have usually been awkward and downright bizarre.

From profuse sweating to stripping off clothing it may get weirder than that but really not much weirder. I've discussed a few of my previous job interviews but I would like to delve into what the universal requirements are for a job candidate based off of my own experience.

Number one rule. First impressions Last.
They set the frame for the rest of the convo. Now this may be a social construct in which you are the selectee and they are the selector, however you can apply rules learned from social interations to these contexts. Let's break it down.

Apperance

This is so KEY, its fucking unbelievable the amount of times ive gone to job interviews and I have been very out of place. At Uniqlo, my appearance was shabby, I was sweating profusely and had paranoia about my breath. I also had not slept enough the night before, 3 hours to be precise. They say you should be fuckworthy before stepping out of the house, ALWAYS, but clearly I had ignored this basic rule.

I had prepared very little the night before

-Very brief information about the company and its rules as to dress code and their usual employee. I had dressed very inappropriate in fact it was atrocious in terms of basic style. I wore a red, short sleeve, tight checkered shirt with stonewashed Levi's jeans and a pair of brown, two tone Hudson brouges. Terrible style. A usual Uniqlo employee is dressed in the typical student attire. Skinnies or straight-legged jeans, a pair of plimsols or other canvas type trainer (vans, converse, adidas etc.), plain tee/graphic tee (loose fitting/tight/deep v-neck/u-neck/elbow length/shoulder length), cardigan/hoodie/jumper/vest, beanie/cool hair.

This should have been apparent to me beforehand and is something to keep in mind. Perhaps a basic conversation about how the employee got the job would help me get a better understanding of what is required for that job. This basic initial research would improve my chances of getting at least a second interview. I will do this from now on.

I am aware that my basic dress code is decent because I have a intuitive understanding of what clothes work and do not. This was developed through hanging around the typical black 'sweet boyz' which has been incredible vital in me knowing what trends are on and what trends are off. I am now moving away from that an trying to delve into sexual stereotypes and applying very intricate methods of dressing in order to get some poontang. As they say anything 'sexual and cool will sell'. Ignoring these basic things have left me unemployed and thus more miserable because I am unable to accomplish my other goals.

-No regards to grooming- I looked very tired, my eyes were red and my lips were heavily chapped by this recurrent thing I'd like to call Seborrhoeic dermatitis, quite a mouthful really but whatever.

My recurrent red puffy eyes are due to a bad diet, vampire sleeping hours, gagging on my toothbrush when trying to brush my tongue.

My bad skin is also due to a bad diet, picking on/rubbing roughly on/ no grooming routine.

My bad breath is caused by eating stinky foods (fast food/onion/cheese/milk/sweets), smoking da piff, and not maintaining a steady routine of brushing my teeth upon waking up, after eating a meal and before sleeping. My bad breath is also caused by not flossing properly and using cheap toothbrushes and no mouthwash (i.e. retardex).

My yellow teeth are there because of no dental cleanse/teeth whitening and eating stinky foods then sleeping without killing all the dead shit out of your mouth.

My chapped lips are caused by dehydration/moisture levels constantly changing due to heaters and the cold. I also have a layer of crust on the corners of mouth, lips and also on the top of my lips. I also have not found a satisfactory lip balm that would make my lips more manageable.

I tend to go for safe options such as fully grown stubble, or clean shaven (which looks horrid unless I have all of the above dealt with).

My recent hairstyles have been very safe i.e. one level. This has resulted in me looking like a cliche black dude. The mohican is currently being raped left, right and centre. It's simply overkill. Mind you, I'd done this look a few months back when it was not as hot or popular. I got great responses and felt fucking amazing. The second time getting this haircut, I got a job, had a decent social life and was on my way to gaining a better social life. However this haircut is too obvious and I want to move away from such things.

I sweat badly, especially when heat levels change. It's down to a number of reasons; a bad diet, running out of the shower too quickly, not being as physically fit as I once was, and generally being very nervous.

Demeanour

Depending on where you work, the level of your enthusiasm drops or increases. Due to all of the above problems, I was a mess upon entering the building. I had not gotten the above right so I was in my mind and as a result I did not get the job. Let's break down where I went wrong.

Calm- I was very nervous when I entered as I mentioned above. I'd arrived on time when in reality I should have followed the tried and tested method of 'always arrive 15 mins early'. Simply terrible.

Friendly- I did not converse with any of the people around me and did not smile. Considering I have a naturally gaunt/pissed off expression on my face this really did not help. My eye contact was very poor. I did not take the key opportunities presented to me. Making my presence known. Chatting with a number of people. I dismissed alot of ideas in situations when group work and contribution was key. I was not proactive in other words.

Ambitious- I did not use my initiative to make myself heard. I missed out on a number of key opportunities to really voice my opinion on topics I knew about. Even if they were wrong, I feared rejection and thus was rejected.

State- Had I made an effort to conversate with the people around me, I would have been in a better mood and therefore more chatty which would have resulted in me making more contributions.


Body language- In a key exercise which really would have taken me to the next level, I did not make use of my height and size (I was getting quite buff at the time :P). The group gathered in a circle and I say the group because I was not apart of it from a visual perspective. They had placed an A4 piece of paper on a tiny table (which was obviously intended to show team work skills), I placed myself on the wrong side of the room. I was right behind what looked to be the alpha in the group ( a girl...lol...and a short one at that).

As she was orchestrating most of the stuff going on, I could sense my presence in the group was being ignored more and more. I was clearly not apart of the group. I made some contributions but it was too little too late. I was rude to one dude who wanted to add some alterations to the drawings made by dismissing his idea as silly. Really weak shit. Never again in my life will I subject myself to such awkward behaviour.



Now that I have stated the problems with my job interview approach. Let's look at some solutions as this is the mentality of a successful person.

I will post this in my next post which will be well...right about now..LOL

22....who will I be this year?

Well...

It's the first week of the new year and something amazing has happened to me. I am more optimistic than I have ever been. I have a number of experiences that I'd like to write about.
Let's start from my Bday onwards as that is the point when I really feel I had a major paradigm shift. I had been hanging with Denis for the majority of that week and it had been very amusing to say the least. I learned alot of new things that I had never known about Denis i.e. that he is a deeply devout Christian although not orthodox but more of a evangelist and that he is very intelligent.

I mean do not get me wrong I always knew he was intelligent but hanging around with him for more than a day which I had never done, really showed me how ambitious this dude is. Another interesting thing occured when I found out about his relationship with his parents and the reason for he wanted independence at such an early age. I also developed a deeper bond with Denis which I really appreciate as he is a good influence for me.

I had also realised something major about another person in my life, namely Syed Zeeshan, who btw is the textbook nice guy. He really is an amazing friend in terms of being courteous and polite. However he really lacks in confidence and is extremely stifled which is mostly due to a number of insecurities- his looks, his virginity and inability to talk to women. Aside from these setbacks, he has a number of things going for him; he is financially stable and is extremely resourceful.

The big problem he has is.....wait for it..........a lack of COJOLES/BRASS BALLS. I have the same problem and can easily recognise this, not that it requires any skill. He is apparently incapable of pushing past his comfort zone socially and is therefore stiffled. His body language is good although he has a terrible tendency to look at me strangely almost with a sneer and an air of disgust. It is really quite something. Despite this, he is a really sensible chap with a good heart but he is not a 'natural' as they say in the community.

These two people really gave a shit about me this year although, bdays are not really a big deal at this age. To be quite honest, I am unbelievably young and have yet to experience alot and have formulated much of my reality based on what I have read on some forums. It really pisses me off how inexperienced I am but you live and you learn.

So.....onto these last 10 days that have gone.

I started a little experiment in getting up early i.e. before 6am everyday and boy did it provide me with some newfound insights. NUMERO UNO, I realised how accustomed my body had become to sleeping late and what sleeping early had done. Basically I had tried the Steve Pavlina wake-up-at-the-same-time-everyday-but-sleep-when-you're-tired. Also, I had some interesting revelations about myself. I will list them one by one and elaborate on each.

Sleeping when you're tired

This was by far the most amazing 4 days in terms of the amount of time I had been in deep sleep. It was also the first time in months that I had consistently had dreams, night after night.
I also felt really energised when I woke up without an alarm clock before 6am, yes you read that right, I woke up daily at 5-5:40am without fail. The first day was the worst but it got progressively better and I really felt tired when the clock hit 10am. I literally could not hold my eyes open past 9:30pm.

Waking up at the same time daily

The reason I had chosen to wake up before 6am is that I had really felt deep in my heart that I had not woken up before sun rise in such a long time I had forgotten what it looked like. I also felt that I'd have longer days and thus more time to do things. My energy levels would also go up due to the improved sleeping patter.

What I did find was that I had felt an incredible high every single morning. Almost like I was on crack. It was amazing. I felt so energized and was more productive than usual. I applied for 4 jobs although I had aimed for 50..lol. Probably an unrealistic target but I thought I could achieve this. Truly, an amazing period of time. What I also found was that I had not been following a morning routine for the last 5 years but instead been going with motions.

I spend WAYYYYY too much time in the toilet just brushing my teeth which is mainly due to not brushing the night before; 30-40 mins, I spend too long showering, washing/exfoliating/aimlessly scrubbing at my face/occasionally shaving and moisturizing; 30 minutes.
To add to this I spend an incredible amount of time wandering around the bathroom and frequently looking at myself whilst brushing my teeth.

I haven't even gotten to dressing up, eating or working out yet and I have already spent 1 1/2 grooming aimlessly. The worst thing is that I do it so slow and mostly not in the order above. I then eat sometimes if I find the time and then finally after having been screamed at by my mother I finally get my ass out of the door.

This is a SERIOUS problem which has really affected my whole life and where I currently am. I will not go into what-ifs but I can assume from the little experiment that I did that I would not be where I am right now had I prepared a morning routine which was both time-efficient and effective.

However this is a new year and I will be another cliche and say my resolution for this year is to drastically improve the weak areas, currently all areas lol. Ranging from social life, health and finances. I am committed to leading a healthy lifestyle in terms of my diet, my workout regimen and my sleeping patterns. I am committed to becoming a more social person and also to improving my sex-life (No more porn!!!! unless for educational purposes lol). I am committed to getting a job which provides me with a suitable income to support my other interests and also provides me with a challenge on a continual basis.

The areas I will first handle are my social life and finances. I will maintain a steady workout regimen and a clean diet until I can find a job that will provide me with the capital to join a gym.
I am also joining a muay thai and jiu jitsu class. Luckily there is a fellow from the LSS who provides free jiu jitsu classes which will give me a taster. I am joining London Muay Thai by the end of this month. I also intend on gaining my undergraduate degree by may. I am also acquiring my driver's license before february and intend on gaining enough capital to get a car by May. I will move out of my mother's house by the end of February.

These are some initial goals which I will focus on for the meanwhile until I can get a steady routine established. I will then improve more areas.

This will be : THE BEST YEAR OF MY LIFE.

I am improving most of the areas of my life which most people have already sussed out and hopefully I can focus on bigger dreams once those are dealt with. My intention is to become a Hollywood actor and will hopefully implement a routine in order to gain that dream. I must get there without fail. I have contemplated whether or not to do this but then again hesitation is for the meek. I must be ballsy in order to achieve this dream.

It will take time and an incredible amount of grinding as I have been for a large amount of time a very introverted socially inept dude. However by the end of this year I shall join the theater and hopefully hone my craft. The reason why I wish to act is due to the symbolism of it. I wish to be an inspiration to others that anything truly is possible. I wish to be taken as a serious actor in terms of my range and versatility ala Johnny Depp or Brad Pitt. I do not want to be confined to a box. I will continually evolve.

The reason why I wish to partake in this dream is that I feel and know that I am destined for GREAT things. I will not settle for mediocrity as I am far too ambitious for that. I have one go at this merry go round and intend on making it the best fucking life I can possibly lead. I have continually given up on things my whole life and do not intend on doing so from now onwards.
I have changed my innergame and feel more at peace with myself. However I have much to do still and will continue until my dying breath.

This is the time for change.






Arriverderci

BIG SEAN

I HEART THIS MAN...seriously.

Let me recap a few things I've learned whilst being in the seduction community.

Early community days

• 3-second rule approach
• opener
• time constraint
• disqualify
• befriend group
• isolate
• kino
• comfort
• number/kiss/SNL
• Cocky funny
• Peacocking
• AMOG

Middle years of community

• Frame control
• Inner Game
• Cocky Funny Advanced
• social proof
• advanced peacocking
• comedy
• improv
• day game
• body language
• buying temperature

Recent community

• Natural game
• RSD Lording
• Core Identity
• Mystery Method - considered unnatural
• Alpha body-language examples
  
• Laser eyes/ Sticky eyes
• Vocal Projection
• More mainstream/Sexual clothing- Peacocking deemed too crass and faggish..
• Frame control - Swinggcat
  
• Ploughing
• Entourage game

Inner game specialists works were introduced as a result of RSD's Natural movement such as:

• Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now
• Byron Katie's The Work
• The Sedona Method (can you let go? When? lol)
• George Leonard's The Art of Mastery
• Robert Greene's 48 laws of power
• Josh Waitzkin Art of Learning
• Michael Jordan's Driven from within
• Ayn Rand The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged
• David Deida- The Way of the Superior Man
• The Red Queen
• Sperm Wars

Alpha-male characters from movies and TV Shows

Adopting Body language of George clooney, Brad pitt, Denzel Washington, James Gandolphini's and Tony Soprano too name a few.

Lifestyle development

Become a sex-worthy guy whose lifestyle attracts women. Develop other areas of life such as health (become more attractive physically and take part in a sport or two), wealth (become more financially independent by avoiding the rat race and opting for more innovative income streams) and relationships (commit to creating better relationships with friends and families, actively approach new people whose lifestyles you wish to emulate and can add more value to your life).

I have been apart of the seduction community since 2006. It has been a life changing experience as that it has given me the tools to really make a MASSIVE change in my life's direction. I have been very fortunate to be exposed to this information. It has given me an insight reserved for the few. I'm not speaking of regular community shit but more in depth high-tech knowledge which will help me achieve my goals.

Now back to the main topic of this thread. Sean Messenger was a bastion of the early days of the pickup community. He came into the pickup with PU101, that hosted insanely expensive bootcamps that caused a number of desperate individuals a bad case of buyer's remorse ( kinda like banging a gremlin).

However after a few years of having his soul bitch slapped by the devil re-incarnate lance mason, he decided he would take a more should we say, pacifist type approach. Considering Sean's apperance (one part tatted irish hard-knock, 6'4, built like a bull, with eye contact so intense you might...tinkle in your calvin's) and his overall belief system, it provides an interesting synergy of opposing forces. The 'Ard bastard with the heart of gold. Believe you me, Sean DOES have a really good heart and I say this as a complete stranger.

I am usually a good judge of character and can tell BS from a mile away but SM is the real deal. He's a really down-to-earth individual who gives value like no other. He had the chance to make it big with PU101 but decided to discard that whole phase of his life and start afresh. I commend that and can admire someone who is willing to put it all on the line for integrity.

I've also learned a few things so this post isn't necessarily a SM cockfest ( no homoerotic).
Sean Messenger is an avid believer of the natural, integrity, respectful, ballsy type of approach to seduction. He has removed himself from the routine based gaming and advocates developing the inner game of the individual, a no-guru type of approach.

This in turn leads to a well balanced individual which I for one, believe is the way forward.

In other areas of the community, there is now also a great model for newbies to follow on their PUA journey. There are a number of methods out there which basically advocate the same things under a different logo and name so it may confuse newbies who have entered the game post mystery. However, with the wide spread infection of fraudulent companies popping up and every dude who masters the game wanting to teach what he has learned back to the community, a watch dog is needed more than ever.

Sites like theplace are great for a more neutral review. This has helped keep me centred as I get a heads-up on the up and coming products.

Anyways I just felt like writing a little review of what I had learned in the community so far just to keep track. This is not detailed by any manner but just provides a brief overview of the community lineage as it grows.

I am committed to executing the plan which I have set for myself starting with the Superconfidence course. I will start tomorrow unlike the bitch-move I made last week.

TIME FOR SOME ACTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RETURN OF THE MACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HELL YEAH BIATCHES!!!! Im back. Let me break down what Ive just been through. After finishing my usual wankathons (which have to stop btw), I checked my rss feed and browsed through a few of my fav blogs, one which happens to be written by a dude who I am absolutely certain is in one of my classes at uni. I don't know the dude but would love to meet him (no homo) because we share common interests, he's heavily into the A-Ron, NYC, Heron Preston, Fixed Gear bikes type of steez. So he's basically a really cool dude from what I can see from his blog. ANYWAAAAAAAAAAYYYYSS. As I was saying, I'm reading this dude's blog and happen to just click one of the links on the comments section which then forwards me to this other dude's blog.

This new dude (let's call him A because I'm too lazy to get the blog name) has a post on an Unofficial Nike ID party and some pics to go along. There happened to be a Facebook group dedicated to this party so I basically clicked and waited. Boom. I immediately thought of Goldie locks.

I haven't had a oneitis EVER really but this chick here is basically one of the prototypes for my ideal girl. Ok that last sentence made no sense. Basically she's WIFEY status.

Anyways, I click the illustrious group and join. I see the names of the organisers which so happens to be the Nike ID staff that work in Niketown London. I click one of the female names in hopes of finding her. ERRRRRRRRRRRRR nope. Tried again...........................Gabriella Golds.

FUCK ME!!!!..its her....lol. Dude I don't even know this chick and I'm like yes she's mine..lol.
Anyways, I do the obligatory snooping of her photos and other "important" info. My manhood sensed correctly but there was a bonus. SHE'S A TWIN!!!!!!!!!!! Damn...

The name fits, the body is amazing, cute face, lovely green eyes, golden curly hair, light skinned mixed race babe. What more do i need. I basically start to obsess about her friends etc etc. To workout what she may be into. I basically do this stupid approval seeking ANAL PROBE on myself ( No homosexual) for about an hour. I think 'damn this girl is to nang. What do i do? I wanna be her man blah blah blah'. I think to myself she's a hypebeasts prototype in that she is into the scene deep so you have common interests and LOADS to chat about. Perfect GF material.

Then I do some further Sherlocking (see what I did there..Sherlock was a...FUCK it never mind) and find her and these hood rat niggas from the bits (South im guessing) doing the obligatory 'NAPA (insert year of debauchery) trip. HMMMM...and here I am thinking this girl is probably posh and is not into hood niggas. Boy was I wrong.

I hit the LSS and click a random post by one of the suicidal individuals on the board whom after reading his shit isn't I'm afraid..lol? Anyways, man dem is complaining something serious about him not being able to feel worthy in the presence of 9s and 10s. After scrolling past the usual flame replies I find a sweet link by none other than LSS Lord Mega Pork of the Swinedom.

BOOM!..

Read....

4 concepts:

-Player not spectator (source: Tim RSD)
- Be present, clear your mind (source: Eckhart Tolle)
- No penitence or resistance (source: RSD, Bullboy, Me)
- Let women inspire you (source: Gunwitch, David Deida)

read the first then the second and finally......

BOOOOMM!!!

NO PENITENCE or RESISTANCE

"If you've watched the blueprint, you will know that resistance is an emotion. Just like happiness or sadness. Resistance is the emotion you feel when your environment / reality is not to your liking. It comes across as an uncomfortable feeling. A passiveness that shuts you down and restricts you from action.

Penitence is another emotion. It is the feeling of beating yourself up over something that you have or have not done.

To me these two emotions are linked and neither emotion pertains to having FUN. The fact is that you will NOT always like your environment and it is inevitable that you will make mistakes. That you will freeze or not act when you promised yourself or that you will fuck up. But unfortunately, being a perfectionist is pointless in PU, so what you should do instead is deal with the emotions when they turn up.

1. Again, be self aware. Notice if you are feeling either emotion. The tricky thing about our emotions is that they are such a deep part of ourselves that we often don't notice if we are feeling a certain way. If you feel them, cut them off immediately.
2. Realise that if entertained, either resistance or penitence will NOT help you. There is no point entertaining either emotion. Notice I'm not saying feel, because you can't help that, but rather let those emotions get the better of you. Since they will not help you, when you notice them, you need to quickly get on top of them.
3. Eckhart Tolle says that if you experience something you have two options, you can accept it, or you can change it. Being able to clear your mind using the techniques I mention above will start you off. The next step is then to quickly jolt yourself into action.

A practical example: You promised yourself that you will open the next hotty but you don't. So you start to beat yourself up about it. But then you notice that you are beating yourself up about it. So you say to yourself, fuck that, clear your mind and relax. Walk away for a bit and open another girl.

The same goes for resistance. Except with resistance you more often have to accept what's going on. For example, you're in a club with hot girls but you don't like the music. What do you do? Bitch about the music, or just get on with it and just appreciate the environment for what it is?

Another resistance example is you want to get into "state", but because you want it, your current emotion is not good enough, you create resistance to your current emotion, and consequently you can't get into "state". Solution: don't worry about state. Enjoy the moment for what it is, appreciate the women around you, then act."

Terrible paraphrasing, I know I know, but I couldn't sum it up without posting the article.There it is. The Shaytan that has been consuming me, the gremlin inside of me that kept growing every time I entered a club or any other social venue. It's the main fucking problem I put myself into daily and until now had no idea how to deal with. I tried different mantras; telling myself I'd be fine and that it didn't matter. None of which have worked so far. This has been the number one issue that has practically killed all of my interactions.

What a life-saver. Thanks porky.

P.s. I'd like to add that the other points which included letting yourself go in terms of being attracted to females and not restraining yourself was insightful. Also to have loads of reference experiences so that your subconscious is aware that this is not a new and scary proposition but as natural as breathing. Sex is just that, natural and healthy.

Onto other news.......

When initially reading the post which led me to the gem stated above, I was still on that approval seeking mission. My aim: To find out how to seduce women that are in scenes. What I failed to realise but do now is that we all are part of scenes...DUHHHHHHHH.

HAHAH...what complete self-rape. I'm into the party scene, PUA. The difference between me and Gabriella Golds is that she is basically expressing herself thorough action. She is actively pursuing her dreams. Whereas I was a recluse, until now that is. NO MORE!! I've tortured myself long enough. Most of my teens had been spent online and actively awkward behaviour. Well that is in the past. As Tolle said "The past is a previous manifestation of NOW" or something along those lines. I have been actively been inactive for fear of ridicule and nonacceptance.

Well fuck that. Months and months of reading articles, forums, books, listening to audios has finally hit me on a deep level. Its all been internalised. From now on I am James Devoe becoming Moe Warsame. Ive kept this alter ego of mine hidden for too long time. Flashes of JD have been seen from time to time. Well it's time LORD IT UP. Irrelevant let's fuck some biatches!!. GL, as incredibly sexy she is, is just another girl. Seriously, she is one amongst A MILLION or so 6-7s out there.

Amongst the points stated above was a suggestion that I treat all physically beautiful girls as 7s and if after engaging in convo with her you find out she is cool then she is bumped up to an 8.
Brilliant stuff.

It's time to LORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRD!!

In other areas......

For now though, I am going to do the demonic confidence course to overcome my approach sticking point. I will follow 'the newbie guide to PUA' guideline thread on theplace.bz. To help me along the way. I will read as many Field Reports and Lay reports as possible. I will post an FR here on a daily basis and then I will start to post on theLSS forums once I get past the inital sticking points. I will go out solo from now on twice a week to bars and clubs around London.
I will befriend staff and locals. I will remain independent of the outcome of my approaches. No more needy shit. Fuck that!!

I am sorting out other areas of my lfie also including, health, wealth and general social life. I am utilising all of the tools available to me in terms of time management. I am trying one thing I am shitscared of every week, including flirting with a store assistant, seducing a girl in the daytime going for a same day date and kissing her, check out different scenes in the nightclub circuit, befriend a dude in the cue of a club, setting up a day 2 with a girl and pushing for a lay, hosting a party, sky-dive, horse ride, surf, ollie, befriend strangers in local pubs and bars, driving a motor bike, go to a festival by myself, travel by myself, move out of my mum's house, go to a tango class, muay thai class, brazilian jiu jitsu class etc.

That's all I can think of right now and should be more than enough for a year. However I am starting with basic shit first. 5 sets per day. I will work on eyecontact in all interactions that I have whether listening or talking or lazer eyes, I am working on voice projection aswell; speaking louder and more clearly. In time this will all internalise and tada! James Devoe will commence.

I am starting today, I will go to Kingston Bentall Centre and do the basic approaches there.
Where is the post office?? 5 sets of girls.

I will report back on my findings later today.